Author: Jordanna Morgan (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Archive Rights: Please request the author’s consent.
Rating/Warnings: PG for implied adult situations.
Characters: Mikaela and Krul.
Summary: Mikaela never slept easily when Krul lay beside him.
Disclaimer: They belong to Takaya Kagami. I’m just playing with them.
Notes: My first “Seraph of the End” fic. A Fandom Stocking gift for EvilMuffins. I’m drawn to the pairing of Mikaela/Krul, but I’m still not sure of how to handle it, so I hope this works.
Mikaela never slept easily when Krul lay beside him.
Every time she summoned him to her private bedchamber, it was like this. He would find himself lying awake… after, even while she was nestled against his side, her various appetites sated. As he stared blankly toward the ceiling, hours might pass before his thoughts and feelings would quiet enough to let him rest.
It wasn’t that he found no enjoyment of his own in these interludes. Vampire or otherwise, he was still a teenaged male, and Krul—even if she didn’t look it—was a scintillatingly eager and commanding older woman. Growing up first in an orphanage and then as livestock, he had never imagined the things men and women might do with one another… until she showed him.
No, it was more that he hadn’t really figured out how to feel about it on a deeper level. All he knew of these matters was what Krul taught him, and he realized that could never be a normal perspective. Not when it was so entwined with his dependence on and craving for her blood. After all, each rendezvous even began with a drink from her veins, before it progressed to the other thing. It was easier not to think about it all when one lust blurred so easily into the other.
Mika supposed not thinking was the best part of it, in the end: not thinking about humanity or vampirism, the past or the future. In those short intervals when his focus was only on flesh instead of blood, he could simply be. Whatever he was, or whatever his queen—for better or for worse—wished him to be.
Yet afterward, his thoughts inevitably came rushing back, and he lay wondering if a part of Krul could ever have intended this for him all along. As time passed, he had grown increasingly aware that it wasn’t the reason she changed him into a vampire; or at least, not the primary one. She believed he was something more, and she had her own grander designs in which he was to play a part.
That thought was still too frightening to face.
Instead, it helped a little to imagine, if only for a while, that she had wanted him this way from the start. That from the day she first saw him, she wanted to take more than his humanity from him.
He didn’t want to be desired as a weapon… but in spite of everything, he couldn’t deny the part of him that wanted to be desired for himself.
© 2015 Jordanna Morgan