Irene: "Well, a scavenger hunt is exactly like a treasure hunt, except in a treasure hunt you try to find something you want, and in a scavenger hunt you try to find something that nobody wants."

Alexander: "All you need to start an asylum is an empty room and the right kind of people."

Blake: "Take a look at the dizzy old gal with the goat."
Alexander: "I've had to look at her for twenty years—that’s Mrs. Bullock!"
Blake: "I’m terribly sorry."
Alexander: "How do you think I feel?"

Angelica: "Come along, goat goat goat!"
Alexander: "Are you talking to me or that thing?"

Alexander: "If you want a forgotten man, you’ll find me home in bed!"

Godfrey: "I was curious to see how a bunch of empty-headed nitwits conducted themselves. My curiosity is satisfied. I assure you, it’ll be a pleasure for me to go back to a society of really important people."

Angelica: "Why did I have to wait until now to find out there’s insanity on your father’s side of the family?"

Godfrey: "Is the family that exacting?"
Molly: "No, they're that nutty."

: "…"